Tag Archives: barbie dolls

The Updates

The sagas described in the past on Truth and Rhetoric have not ended. Based on your feedback and updated events, it seems they have just begun:

A Kid in a Candy Store

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Business has picked up at the Chocolate Wonderfall, I received this photo in a text shortly after the Feedbag post. As a reader, you’re in good company.

Barbie Rehab?

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The Avengers have moved in close to the Barbie Halfway House, pictured here is Hulk and Captain America fighting to become the next Bachelor.

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I think Captain America can do better than this.

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The Barbie fitness room has only gotten worse. The pretend treadmill is still running giving Barbie pretend treadmill burns, unfortunately, she’s too drunk to notice.

Starvation

…and on a serious note, the Privileged Shopper post has received the most reads of any post on this blog. Here is a thoughtful and sobering comment from one of our readers:

“You could have mentioned that the US has the capability to feed almost twice the world’s population given advancements that us spoiled rich people choose to ignore/insult. And a huge reason for the mass starvation in Africa is religiously motivated groups like Boka Haram and Al Shabab that tell their “subjects” that our food is the work of the devil because we’ve fucked with nature. Relief is denied to many regions by armed savages for this very reason.True story: I was standing in line at the [department store] and overheard a wife tell her husband she was buying an air freshener because it said “organic” on the label. An air freshener. Things are going a bit too far.”

Can I mix Barbie updates with world hunger commentary? Hell yes, this is my blog.

Speaking of, Barbie eats organic for her health but drinks like a fish…sound like anyone you know?

….and Starbucks? No change.

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Dirty Blondes

The house was somewhat of a crime scene although, I guess no ‘laws’ had been broken.

Am I wrong for having these thoughts?  I know they’re Barbies and I know they are kid’s toys; but, man- take it at face value and it just doesn’t seem right.

When I finally came clean and told my wife that I was having these thoughts, her only response was, “yeah, I get a little worried about the one who falls over into the grill.”

Barbie, what has happened to you?  Is it drugs? Alcohol?  Simple depression?

I know it probably sounded like a good idea but save the exercise bike for the morning and my God, where were her friends to take her to bed after she passed out?

OK, What the fuck is going on here?  Miniature Ken, what the fuck man, get yourself together.  Does my daughter need to be seen by a professional?

Yuck, whose clothes are those?  Do you even know?

Oh God, please be careful by the stairs.  Wait, miniature Mom Barbie who drives the minivan in the dog house? Really?

No Comment.

Dude!  Get the fuck up and get out of there.  It probably seemed like a good idea last night, but seriously dude, get up and go home.

I know this was a weird post and honestly I don’t sit around and examine the Barbie half-way house all the time but sometimes it catches my eye.  When 7 or 8 exquisitely dressed Barbies are strewn about face down, half dressed or in various form in the bathroom, all seemingly conscious and smiling, a guy puts a story to it and a little pride in most men swells when GI Joe has clearly been a part of it.